More Scary Stories to Tell in The Dark...
No, this post isn't about a man who makes sausage out of children and serves it in his deli...it isn't about the girl driving home who's warned about a ravenous killer in the backseat of her car by a stranger flashing high beams. It's not even the one where the lady attends what she thinks is Christmas mass...only to find that she has attended a mass consisting only of the dead. This is post is about dating and falling in love. Two things that scare me so much right now. I'm not cynical, I'm not bitter. I'm just exhausted from all the hurt and confusion these two things always seem to cause me. I bring this up because I may be falling for someone again...he tells me everything I want to hear and it makes me feel so good. It also frightens me because I wonder if he's just another smooth talker who's going to sweep me off my feet only to "get mixed up" and decide he doesn't have time for love. I don't like this post because it's revealing so many insecurities I wish I didn't have. I hate to expose how much I care, I wish I didn't care. Ah, to be callused (sp) and abrasive so that I'd never feel the nauseating pain of two hands wrenching my beating heart from me, only to discard it when things aren't perfect. Boy, that was dramatic. Are we sure this isn't Nick posting? Ah, Nick...I kid, I kid! I guess I'm just trying to brace myself for the difficult road ahead...but who knows? Maybe this guy is for real, or maybe after spending a whole weekend together I'll realize I'm not that interested after all. Maybe things will be okay. Maybe. But if he is for real, and things work out that's another scary story in itself because if I married him...it would mean...MOVING BACK TO UTAH!!! AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But at least I don't have to worry about THAT for awhile. Chances are, I'll be in China before that ever becomes an option. Let's cross our fingers shall we?
posted by Moonery at
10:02 AM
4 Comments:
Ha Suzy! You are turning into me! Moody broodings about love is what I LIVE for.
Truth is - as mystical as it all sounds, even if/when you find the "one" there will still be a mountain of obsticles to overcome.
Sometimes I think it's less about the people and more about timing. You can enjoy a combination of people - but timing that's key. You have to wait for it to "click" and when it does it's easy.
But I know what you're saying - I want to keep my heart on the "shelf" until I'm sure - secure. And I really don't know when that will happen.
But one can't really keep their heart in a jar and live can they?
By
jez, At
4:43 PM
I totally agree with the timing issue Nick was talking about. Also, the obstacles, oh the obstacles! Love isn't easy, that's for sure. If it is, then you know something must be wrong...
Just keep your head in the game and lock your heart up behind a concrete wall--that's what I say! Just kidding, but seriously, if you want to stay sane through the whole thing, whenever you feel yourself falling madly, deeply in love--just imagine the guy is a pedophile or something horrible like that. That will keep you grounded...
Ah, yes, this is just me rambling again.
By
Anonymous, At
11:20 AM
I always like to balance the fantasies... daydreaming in bed..... 50% of the time the guy stays madly in love with me and we live happily ever after. 50% of the time he jilts me and I move on to extreme levels of financial, physical, and popular success... and he breaks his back in some $25 a night holetel writhing in regret. I think that is a healthy approach.
By
Charisee310, At
8:56 PM
Ha! You guys are great!
By
Moonery, At
9:28 AM
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home