I'm Too Sexy for My Toe

'Twas a chill February evening when I, an innocent girl of not yet 25 years fell prey to a horrible, senseless toe-stubbing. Mind numbing pain and an unsightly limp were the least of my worries, for as I changed the toenail polish a few days later a terrifying truth was revealed to me. The stubbing had caused an impact crack all the way down my beloved toenail nail. Typically one doesn't appreciate full, healthy toenails until one is injured thusly, but I am an exception. A lover of all things feet, I take great pride in my tootsies and this new development filled me with such misery I could hardly bare to look nor think of it.
A short trip to California was a minor distraction and I had my sister Charise, who is something of a super-glue expert attempted a minor surgury on said toenail ensuring it would not snag on a sock, blanket, or furry alien and be violently ripped off before its time. Operation super-glue was a minor success and as a testiment of this, this beautiful March morn, I sat in the back yard barefoot and was hypnotized by the miraculous healing of my toe. Where once was a horrible cracked nail threating to rise off the nail bed in such fashion as those horrible commerials for fungi removal, there was now a healthy, pink nubbin of a nail growing forth new and beautiful. The cracked, dead nail popped off with a satisfying snap and I am pleased to report I am free of it's menacing presence.
Let this be a lesson to all of you, dear readers. Toenails are to be cherished, appreciated and loved at all times! I was lucky...I could have lost my toe. I could have lost my leg. I could have lost the ability to walk, and think, and love. Life has given me a second chance...will you be so fortunate?