Am I So Out of Touch?

Maybe I’ve been spoiled by the plethora of fabulous concerts I’ve been able attend in my life. From Oingo Boingo to Wilco to Depeche Mode, I have witnessed musical genius on many different levels. None of which was displayed at last nights Billboard Music Awards. Opening was a performance of Holiday by Greenday, a peppy hit from our new anti-Bush spokesmen. While I’m not keen on the Green, it was a rousing display of energy and pyrotechnics. Although, I’m still trying to figure out the metaphor behind the silly crutch Bill Joe waved around at the end before snapping it in two and throwing it to the ground like a frustrated three-year-old. After that, it was yawn central. Countless performances of R&B songs, complete with more choreographed gyrating than a Fosse musical were accented by the occasional “Hooray for everything!” statements. All throughout the show, the announcer teased about a “Special performance” by a “Secret Performer.” This kept everyone’s attention, and whispers floated over the audience of possible artists. “I heard Brittany Spears was sighted…maybe it’s her?” “Aerosmith loves Las Vegas, maybe it’s them?” “Michael Jackson, attempting to make a comeback?” Well ladies and gentlemen, hold on to your socks…the secret artist was…was…
R KELLY, who had, in fact already performed earlier in the show. Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaa? What a let down! But before I sound like a complete pessimist who would be disappointed with a unicorn for my 8th birthday, let me review some of the highlights.
*Gwen Steffoni-darling Gwen. She never disappoints, and looked like an absolute darling in her little red dress.
*Tom Petty and the tribute to him. What an amazing man, an amazing musician.
And…
*I’m a little embarrassed to admit, I enjoyed Carrie Underwood While I’m not big on the American Idol phenomenon, it was refreshing to hear a young, vibrant girl sing with an amazing voice and absolutely no pelvic thrusts.
Perhaps I shouldn’t bag on the show so much. Really, the problem could lie in myself. Maybe I just don’t know good music. There is a chance that I’m ridiculously out of touch. But I don’t ever want that to change. Not ever! But who knows…if I keep up my guitar playing I just may be asked someday to appear on some lame awards show.
Nahhhhhhhhh!