Betwixt Scott and I

From Scott:
Again, I have sorta cheated, but Dudicomcast almost works. Hmmm...I wonder if I can sue them for the rights to that name. I will be rich! Or maybe just get free cable. Which I would be just as happy with. The word engorged does indeed belong on the list of words that need to exist, but shouldn't ever be used. There are others, but I'm sleepy and can't think of them right now. Aw well. The travel gods can be a fickle foe, to be sure. You didn't miss any sort of fun. Mostly I took a nap, which is far less fun than a haunted house, but more fun than being engorged. But fear ye not! Halloween is just getting geared up, so there will be plenty of opportunities to go-a-haunt'n. Are you feeling better? You are always welcome to visit the dudicouch if you would like. It is one of my better purchases. You sit in it, and you sink. I had to wear a snorkle to go looking for the TV remote. Anyway, hope the throat demon goes away soon. Back to throat hell I suppose. Yes, if a haunted house plan is forged, I will give you a call. Something will take place, I'm sure. Kategory V is possibly the best name ever for a band. And possibly a candy-themed hurricane. Ha! I too never thought I would be saying the old-persony words of "These kids and their rap music". The other day some popular new band showed and I was simply "Why this doesn't this sound like the music I like?" Then I yelled at some kids to get off my lawn. It's every boys dream to be in a heavy metal band at some point, so I admire him for living the dream. I joined a ska band, which doesn't quite have the same punch, but it will have to do. Anyway GET BETTER! Please?

My Reply
Can you imagine what a delicious disaster a candy-themed hurricane would be? I imagine it would look like a cyclone (even thought its a hurricane) of cotton candy and torrants of skittles raining from the sky. People wouldn't know whether to laugh or run from the mighty forces of candy and nature combined. The aftermath, as seen on CNN would show Sean Penn looking like a cotton candy snowman foraging his way through the sweet wreckage of whatever city had been ravaged. Oh good times. Clean up would be tricky. I mean sticky. I've given way too much thought to this. I'm feeling much, much better! Sunday I was feeling pretty good, but tired so I used that as an excuse to skip church and TV gorge the day away. After I felt rested and ready for the week! Plus I got a free flu shot from work, so hopefully I won't see the sickness bird flying over my head for at least a year. I've never gotten a flu shot before, but I get sick so often (My sisters call me the sickly Victorian) so I thought I'd give it a shot. A shot! Ha! I"m so ready to get my Halloween on, you don't even know. I can't wait until October 1st. I'm making a gingerbread haunted house from a kit you can buy at Michael's craft stores. Really, the project is for my nephew Austin but I was looking at the box and thinking of all the possibilites. I have a feeling I'm going to completely take over and make it my own. Mwa ha ha ha....maybe I'll buy us each a kit. Hmmm...I'll have to figure that part out later.

A Halloween Story by Scott

Twas the night of Halloweenfestathon 2004. The night had gone as well as could be expected. Soup had been served in bread bowls, little plastic spiders had been tossed all over the place, and Mingus had suckled upon Joey's teat. The problem here was that all of this had happened already, and it was just now passing 9:30 PM. I was out of material to keep the fantastic fun continuing. I tried throwing more spiders, but one flew into someone’s eye, and I decided that the guests would probably have more fun if I didn't blind them. I didn't take long for me to realize that I hadn't planned the event out particularly well. I had a remote controlled zombie, and I guess I thought that it was all I was going to need for the evening. I mean, the thing freakin' crawls! I could watch it for hours, except it creeps me out so I just leave it in the box. Anyway, it soon becomes apparent to some of my more observant guests that I no longer have any plans for the evening, and I note that some folks start getting restless. I start to hatch a fantastic escape plan for myself should things get ugly. It involved a lot of owl noises and all the cans of shaving cream that I can get my hands on. Anyway, at this point, barlow declares that a special screening of "Night of the living dead" will be taking place at that nifty theatre that occupies the basement of the West's home. I was saved! Soon everyone but myself has begun the journey to the Wests. I hang back to do my initial little plastic spider roundup. Ah, I should have mentioned at the start that while costumes were not required to the event, they were wholly endorsed. And, appropriately, some folks came in costume, and some did not. As for myself, I have a costume that I wear every year. When I put on this costume, a no longer am mild-mannered dudicus64, but rather, I become mild-mannered dudicus64 in a expensive wizard costume. This costume come complete with robe, rope belt (apparently wizards are pretty cheap), a staff with some sort of head upon it, and finally, a majestic wizard hat with a big plastic skull upon the front. I assume that this skull is in place to let other wizards know that I am a wizard bad-ass. Well, now we have that little bit of information out of the way, lets continue on with the main plot line. So, as I'm picking up literally thousands of little plastic spiders, I get an idea. "Lets go to the Wests in our wizards costume" I thinks, "Then I truly will be the king of halloween". So, I give up on the spider picking-up, and race around to get myself in complete wizard form again. Finally, I manage to pin down all the elements of the costume and hop in my car. This task is complicated by the fact that I'm not used to driving in standard wizard clothes, and when I go to make a right turn, I find that one of my magnificent wizard sleeves is rather unceremoniously pinned firmly in my car door. Being a wizard is proving to be more difficult than anticipated. One doesn't think about the dangers facing a driving wizard until they have found themselves in that position. Finally, I manage to complete the turn by pinning my wizards staff to the steering wheel and shoving on it with my foot. I was rather proud of that, and that is the only reason I have shared this part of the tale. So finally I arrive. I take a few minutes to free all the bits and pieces of my garment from the clutches of my car, grab my staff (not in the perverted sense), and enter the party already in progress. What I sight I was! Truly, if a nerd ever really did become a wizard, he would look just like me that night! I say a polite, wizardly hello to all the guests around me and then I see the dog.... To say that things got weird at this point would be a bit of an understatement. Never before has such an awesome K-9 transformation taken place in such a short amount of time. In the matter of....well...no time really, the Wests dog has gone from a seemingly mild version of mans best friend to a spinning, barking, growling and overall freaking out twister of destruction. The poor beast would not dare venture closer than 10 feet to me, but from that distance this creature put up a most impressive display of little dog ferocity. In response to this alarming turn of events, I do what anyone in my awkward situation would do. I turn and charge towards the dog. The response to this was fantastic. The dog nearly runs straight through a couch and probably would have not thought twice about going through a window to escape my apparently terrifying visage. Now, I'm not a cruel person. I see that my presence is causing this dog no end of torment, so I call off my chase of the dog. To help calm down the poor little critter, Joey picks her up and begins to talk soothingly to her. All the time this dog is still just spazzing out, complete with the barking and any other noise that a dog can manage to make. Then I notice it. Joey is seemingly covered in a growing pool of some sort of liquid. "What is that stuff"? I ask myself. That crazy Joey is covered in something! About this time, Joey too notices the mystery liquid, and we all soon conclude that I had indeed scared the dog badly enough that it hath loosened it's bowels upon Joey. I don't remember exactly, but I believe that upon further inspection, no small amount of fecal material was also found upon the floor*. I had literally scared the shit out of the Wests dog. I took off the costume, but to this day that dog won't venture more than 10 feet closer to me. So if any of you have a bothersome wizard living 'round your parts, don't invite the wests over.


*Joey ate the poo.

Mystery of the Missing Blog

Why did my blog just vanish into thin air? I'm scared.

Someone hold me.

I'll repost as soon as I stop shaking.

Eye Pod

What a device this thing is! Lightweight and durable with thousands of songs to listen too! Last night I borrowed Elizabeth's iPod to go running. Between Michi's shoes she gave me and Elizabeth's tunes, it was an amazing run! What a difference having upbeat songs to daydream to rather than my own dusty thoughts it makes to my speed and endurance. I feel like I could have ran all night, had the Ipod not died less than 2 miles into my run. After that, I was done. Seems a girl can dependant on such things in a hurry!

BOO!!!

Are you scared?

Cuz you should be!!
Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!

BOO!!!

Magic

In a Fed Ex envelope it came. Small and light, who could imagine what wondrous item was held within? I thought I might know. I had hoped and waited and paid an extra $50 dollars to have it expedited to me. With trembling hands, I ripped the package open and held in my hands something magical. With this one thing, I could see new lands. Experience new people, new food, new cultures. Though the face smiling back at me from the colorful pages looks slightly less glamorous than I had hoped, I’m thrilled. What a magical thing a passport is!

Cupcake

Just one glance and I knew you. You knew me with a single touch. Knew I had to have you. Taste you, feel you inside me.

I washed you down with milk and the taste lingers. A pink smudge of icing on my finger. I bring the tip to my lips and remember how good it tasted to be loved and alive.

May I have another?

All I can think about...

Is Paris!

And I'm not talking about the droopy-eyed heiress either. I'm talking Paris, France baby! Fabulous cheese, interesting architecture, fashion, snobbery, Paris! For the very first in my life, I'm finally taking the bold leap into international travel. Kicking the red white and blue dust off my feet, I'm leaving US soil for a few adventurous days. My goals are to sleep less than four hours each night, see and do everything I possibly can and eat all the delicious French food I can get my paws on.

This trip isn't until November. I am so glad I'll have Teague's blessing, Friday the 13th in Redondo Beach and Halloween to help me pass the time!

My Room

My room is a mess
And I have to confess
I hate living like I do.

So this Saturday,
Come what May
I'm going to dejunk and declutter.

Take things to DI
Though it may make me cry
I'll dejunk my room or in the process die!

Breathe little blog, breathe!

Gasp, cough, sputter.
Hi everyone! It's good to be back. Just so ya's all know, I only stopped blogging because everyone else did. Since I am just another fluffy head in a flock of sheep I had to do what everyone else did, or in this case didn't do.

But now, I'm back!

Graurnt!